Healthy boundaries are, or rather have been an enigma to me. I’m risk here and be absolutely transparent like tissue paper… I have weak boundaries. I feel like I’m at the lectern in an AA meeting, and just as sober as though I’m a regular.
As Teal Swan shares in this video called “I Can Have Me and I Can Have You Too”, I tend to “cave” and let my boundaries be broken and disregarded. The MKMMA experience is helping me become a much better observer of my existing blueprint in this respect. I have 50+ years of programming to break down so it takes every day being conscious and observant to ferret out these tendencies, and expose them like film lying in the activating chemicals that bring the images to life.
In our Silence exercise, I was amazed that I spent much of my time contending with “monkey mind”. That state of thought described as running around in your head being unable to concentrate and focus on one thing. This week, in combination with the emotional exercises, I came to recognize that the list of things that drove me nearly crazy were all lists of duties and commitments to other people (many of which violated my boundaries). These are old counter-productive habits, that need to be eradicated. Their extinction will bring me more health and an Acceptance/Defenselessness attitude to be more in alignment with the Law of Least Effort.
This last week with Scroll VI I’ll be watching to see why I might feel Sad, or Depressed of worst of all because it is the “opposite of money consciousness” as Haanel puts it. I know I have the tools to change it but, driving to the root and learning how to proactively build a new blueprint that supports my emotional system is where I want to be. More than anything, I want to be a solid, assertive and well-balance individual, capable of being alone all the while happy to be a part of the larger Universal plan as well. Is this not fulfilling my purpose? I am coming to realize that “Money has no value except to bring about the conditions we desire, and these conditions are necessarily harmonious. Harmonious conditions necessitate sufficient supply, so that if there appears to be any lack, we should realize that the idea or soul of money is service, and as this thought takes form, channels of supply will be opened, and you will have the satisfaction of knowing that spiritual methods are entirely practical.” ~ Charles F Haanel
I hope you and I both are able to find and strike that balance that makes us both happy with ourselves, responsible yet not self-critical and supportive of others through service as our spirit beckons us to be and thus fulfill our purpose.